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Are you troubled by the following?

Yes No You have experienced or witnessed a life-threatening event that caused intense fear, helplessness, or horror.

Do you re-experience the event in at least one of the following ways?

Yes No Repeated, distressing memories, or dreams. All the fucking time.
Yes No Acting or feeling as if the event were happening again (flashbacks or a sense of reliving it)
Yes No Intense physical and/or emotional distress when you are exposed to things that remind you of the event
Do reminders of the event affect you in at least three of the following ways?

Yes No Avoiding thoughts, feelings, or conversations about it
Yes No Avoiding activities and places or people who remind you of it
Yes No Blanking on important parts of it
Yes No Losing interest in significant activities of your life
Yes No Feeling detached from other people
Yes No Feeling your range of emotions is restricted Maybe? I don't know. I don't know what I'm feeling most of the time anyway, so who knows.
Yes No Sensing that your future has shrunk (for example, you don't expect to have a career, marriage, children, or normal life span) It did feel that way for a long time, but with Blaine it's gotten better. I still have a hard time visualizing the future or believing it's real, but not as bad as I used to.
Are you troubled by at least two of the following?

Yes No Problems sleeping Yes, I'm exhausted all the time because of it.
Yes No Irritability or outbursts of anger
Yes No Problems concentrating I think that's my ADHD though.
Yes No Feeling "on guard"
Yes No An exaggerated startle response
Having more than one illness at the same time can make it difficult to diagnose and treat the different conditions. Depression and substance abuse are among the conditions that occasionally complicate PTSD and other anxiety disorders.

Yes No Have you experienced changes in sleeping or eating habits?
More days than not, do you feel…

Yes No sad or depressed? Frustrated and irritable and tired, but not sad.
Yes No disinterested in life?
Yes No worthless or guilty? I think I have good reason to feel guilty though. I don't know that it relates to this.
During the last year, has the use of alcohol or drugs...

Yes No resulted in your failure to fulfill responsibilities with work, school, or family?
Yes No placed you in a dangerous situation, such as driving a car under the influence?
Yes No gotten you arrested?
Yes No continued despite causing problems for you or your loved ones?

What kind of drugs do you take?

I haven't used most of them since meeting Blaine but I used to smoke pot often. Sometimes I'd take ecstasy and LSD. LSD, I use with my psychic to see through the ether. I haven't figured out how to do that with the drugs and I know Blaine doesn't want me using or buying them, so it's a problem. It's driving me crazy I can't go see her to get some direction but I don't to break my promise to Blaine either.
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Elliott Gilbert

November 2016

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